Solstice Contemplations

The shortest day of the year in the Northern Hemisphere, Winter Solstice, is a time of contemplation, reflection, and intention setting. As darkness reaches capacity and starts to give way to light, I sense a time of great hope and awakening. Both in myself, and in the world at large.

To be honest, 2017 was grueling. At the same time, it was the most rewarding. It started with a marriage proposal. A mutual one, but nevertheless a proposal, to which I said yes. Yes to marriage, yes to love, yes to truth. Danny and I have both had our fiery moments of standing firmly in our truth, and in who we are. These moments have not been without consequences however, as we have grieved the hurts and losses, but celebrated the dissolution of the dark giving rise to the light. We have seen the triumvirate Brahma (Creation), Vishnu(Sustenance), and Shiva(Destruction) at play in 2017 like never before. But as the year comes to an end and we sit on the cusp of our 51st and 57th year of orbiting the sun, we rest and abide in a seemingly unending field of grace. We are humbled to be here. Here in this place where abundance seems to have no end. An abundance of love, of support, of means, of health, of beauty, of grace. Lakshmi has shaken the heavens.

So as I look forward into 2018, I contemplate and invite the following:

Increase Capacity, Stop Contraction, Expand Consciousness.

Contraction reduces capacity.

Why increase capacity, why is it so important? What is your fundamental belief about life, your life, and what you want to accomplish? What do you believe to be true about you? Why do you want to numb out? Do you believe in your inherent goodness? Do you believe this Truth: A life rooted in service and offering is the most rewarding? Your Highest Value is Living with Purpose, Meaning.

In reference to capacity, I ask: Is it possible to fly over 100,000 miles a year for work, teach weekly yoga, lead quarterly kirtans, spend quality time with my husband, and explore G.O.D., the Great Out Doors? Is there room in your life for more? Is there also room for balance, being, day dreaming, stillness, quiet, observing, resting, meditating? Can all of that fit into one life without feeling overwhelmed, contracted, anxious, fearful? My tendency is to feel worthy when I’m accomplishing something I value. And to feel unworthy when I’m resting, have free time, reading, not getting anything accomplished, watching football.

Contemplate:

Recognize when your story veers into drama.

Remember the wish to live an intentional life.

What am I doing or thinking in the moment that is limiting my capacity?

What can I do differently in this moment that supports my intention?

Do I believe I have more capacity than I feel?

Where do I feel overwhelm in my body?

Contraction is painful.

Underlying and wrapping it is a nagging, overwhelming sense of unworthiness.

Spend time marinating in your worthiness. In the truth of who you are, the Divine showing up in the world in your body, your mind, your consciousness, as you.

How can you feel unworthy when contemplating this?

Worthiness = Expansion of Consciousness.

It’s going to be an interesting year.

I close with a meditation from Sally Kempton’s 2016 teaching on the Winter’s Solstice.

I breathe this:

Inhale: There is no room in my being for fear, alienation, or a sense of unworthiness

Exhale: My true home is the Self, which is the Self of all.